


Something is Different and Everything's Wrong

by jaztice



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Other, because there just isn't enough lapis angst on this god forsaken website is there, great, in addition jasper is also abusive, jasper is a dick but we already knew that, mentions steven and rose and the crystal gems, peridot says like four things okay dont hate me, pretty short guys, sorry - Freeform, what am i saying I'm not sorry have fun with your angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-21
Updated: 2015-07-21
Packaged: 2018-04-10 10:42:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4388717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaztice/pseuds/jaztice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lapis Lazuli has returned to the Homeworld, but so much has changed and it scares her. That, and she's constantly concerned for Steven. The Homeworld gems are planning something, and Lapis has to warn him. Only problem is that in doing so, Lapis may end up in worse shape than before.</p><p>Takes place from Lapis's perspective right after she sends Steven the message using the wailing stone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something is Different and Everything's Wrong

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this at like 1 am okay don't hate me

             God, I was such an idiot.

            First of all, as soon as Steven healed my gem, I blindly flew straight for the Homeworld, completely forgetting to realize that it had been oh, about FIVE THOUSAND YEARS since I’d last been there. I’d expected things to be the same – apparently, being stuck in a mirror by the Crystal Gems had done absolutely nothing to quell my naivety. Then, when I _reached_ the Homeworld, I’d almost frozen solid; everything was so _advanced_. It was terrifying. What sort of disasters had taken place while I was gone? I didn’t even recognize my own home!

            I’d barely even landed when gems started coming after me. They wanted me alive, to question me, ask me who I was and where I’d been, and being the idiot I am, I ran. I should’ve given up. Now they were mad, and whatever they’d planned for me originally had no doubt gotten worse.

            What frightened me the most though was when I realized what they wanted me _for._

            Which, unsurprisingly, had led me to mistake number four; digging up a wailing stone from some decrepit warehouse and trying to send a message to Steven, to warn him about what was coming.

            I didn’t care about the Crystal Gems. After Rose Quartz defeated Blue Diamond in the Rebellion, her followers were ordered to preserve Blue Diamond’s remaining followers. I’d already been damaged in the battle – my gem was cracked, and I’d been too weak to stop the Gems before they trapped me in that mirror. They imprisoned me and used me like I was a _thing,_ an object for them to control and manipulate, like I was _nothing._ I couldn’t do anything but do as they said, or the Crystal Gems would destroy me.

            Then Steven came along. He _lived_ with the Crystal Gems, or well, what was left of them, and yet he still freed me. He talked to me and saw me as a person, not an object. And then, even after I’d used up his planet’s ocean to try to get back home, he’d healed me using the powers of Rose Quartz.

            It was probably the only good thing that stupid rock had done for me my entire existence, but I was grateful. Steven wasn’t like the other gems – he was kind and caring and wanted nothing more than to see everyone he knew happy. He didn’t deserve to be half human, half _weakling_. If he were a true gem, Steven would be amazing.

            But maybe… maybe his being half human was what made him amazing.

            Ugh, never mind. That doesn’t matter. What matters is that I made that stupid call across the galaxies for Steven, because I wanted him safe.

            Typically, that made me very, very _un_ safe.

            The activation of the stone triggered some sort of alert; almost as soon as I finished my call, I heard a spaceship practically appear over my head. Oh no, I couldn’t get caught like this! I couldn’t let them see what I sent – it’d put Steven in even more danger than he was in!

            I destroyed the wailing stone and ran for the door, but the biggest gem I’d ever seen landed in the doorway, shaking the ground and blocking most of the light. Their silhouette alone terrified me – a gem that enormous had to be a fusion. I couldn’t do anything against a fusion!

            This wasn’t the first time in my life I’d felt such a strong sense of impending doom, but I was truly terrified that it’d be the last.

            The gem laughed, their voice bellowing throughout the warehouse. I could feel my hands tremble as I began to back up, staring at them as they ducked under the doorframe and into the weak light of the building.

            “My, my,” they said, grinning evilly as they stared down at me, “what have we here?”

            I tried to run, but the gem grabbed my arm and threw me across the room like I was nothing. The walls of the warehouse were metal, and my impact put a dent in them before I slid onto the floor, aching and hurting everywhere.

            _Fight!_ Something inside me said. _Fight or they’ll kill you!_

            _No!_ This one was screaming. _If you don’t fight, they’ll go easy on you. Just give up!_

            The gem lumbered towards me, their cackling filling up the entire room. I tried to get up, but I was too weak to even stand; the giant gem, whoever they were, grabbed the back of my hair and pulled me up to their face before I could even get my torso off the ground.

            “Stop!” I screamed, my eyes shut in pain. My wings formed on instinct, but the gem threw me into the wall again before I could go anywhere. Then they kicked my stomach and grabbed one of my arms in each hand, lifting me up to their face.

            I could feel myself shaking, tears streaming down my cheeks as the gem brought me close enough to their face that I could feel their breath.

            _Don’t fight._ This voice had won out, as always. _Don’t fight, don’t rebel. You can’t beat them, don’t act like you can or it’ll make them angry._

            Their eyes stared into mine like I was a prize, a hunting trophy. Quickly, I looked down, hoping they wouldn’t take the brief eye contact as an attempt to show strength.

            My stomach twisted painfully. _Lapis,_ I thought. _When did you let yourself become so weak?_

_When it became necessary._

            “So,” the gem finally said, giving me a petrifying grin, “Lapis Lazuli, finally home from the war. Being trapped on earth for five thousand years must’ve sucked ass, huh? Or were you even trapped there at all?”

            “Please,” I whimpered, “I, I didn’t- I was scared and-”

            “Oh SHUT up!” They threw me down and I fell against a wall, sliding down to the ground. As they came at me again, I backed into the corner next to me and lifted my hands, like I was trying to squeeze myself through the wall.

            “I’m sorry I’m sorry please I’m sorry I didn’t…” I looked away as the giant gem grabbed one arm and lifted me into the air. It was the only way they’d see my face – standing up, I barely even got past their hips.

            “Look at you,” they said, glancing me up and down, “you’re pathetic. Earth must’ve softened you up. But you don’t look like you would’ve been any less useless before anyway. It’d probably be a mercy to just smash your gem and get it over with.”

            My eyes shot up and I stared at them, terrified. They wouldn’t do that, they couldn’t! I hadn’t even done anything!

            The gem saw my eyes and laughed at the fear in them. “Timid, aren’t you?” they said. “Good. Less work getting out the information I need.”

            They let me down on the ground and pulled me towards the door. I could barely keep up; their strides were so long and I wasn’t even able to stand. My feet dragged on the cold metal as I struggled to ignore the pain aching in my body.

            What information did they want out of me? Information about Earth? The Crystal Gems? Steven?

            “Peridot, this is Jasper,” the gem said, speaking into a communication device on their arm. “I have the informant.”

            “You do? Oh, good. Bring her to the ship; we’ll get our information in a secure location.”

            “What do we do after she gives us what we want?”

            “That’s for Yellow Diamond to decide. We’ll just take her with us to Earth – do you think she’ll be a problem?”

            The gem – Jasper – grinned down at me and pulled me out of the warehouse doorway, releasing my arm and grabbing my hair. She pulled my head back until I cried out, and then she threw me to the ground at her feet.

            “No,” Jasper said, looking down at me smugly, “I don’t think she’ll be a problem at all.”

 

* * *

 

            _Be weak, be submissive, don’t fight or rebel or provoke her,_ I thought as Jasper dragged me onto her ship. _Let her do what she wants, it’ll be easier that way. Just give them what they want. You can’t fight them Lapis._

            But something was burning inside me, something strong enough to interrupt my thoughts for just a moment. Jasper and Peridot, whoever they were, would want to hurt Steven. And I wouldn’t let that happen.

            _I won’t be a problem, Jasper?_ I thought. _Let’s see if I can prove you wrong._

**Author's Note:**

> >:]


End file.
